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Jer 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Sunday, January 4, 2009

New Years Resoultions/Catch Up and Thoughts.

I will make this quick but I have been down all week very sick. In lots of pain and migraines and all things stomach related. I am starting to feel better and we plan on tearing down Christmas on the inside of the house tomorrow. The outside is down. We are gearing up to be get back on schedule for school come Monday and on Tuesday I go see my Rheumatoid Arthritis Specialist at BAMC. Its long over do. Me and that man are going to have a long talk and I am getting me a second option. Every watch the show HOUSE on USA Network. Yeah, not as cute or British but rude and old and won't look you in the eye at all and he knows all and is against all other methods of pain control except for his. Chris doesn't agree with me at all which is normal. He has his feeling about my illness as most of my family and friends do, but like I said before, Its me that has to go threw this day after day and I shouldn't have to explain it or feel guilty for being sick anymore or answer the questions or opinions of My Pain, My Fatigue, or how I feel in general and keep letting everyone else make me feel worse about not being the same person/mom/wife that I was before all this came along. I have gotten to that point in this stage of it all and so off to this specialist to make him refer me to a more acceptable Dr. that I like and will work with me and check up in me and follow thru on his testing orders which has not happened. Then off to Neuro to try to figure out why all the migraines. They are worse than ever and I can't take much more of them. I hate them. I need like 3 scans of all different types and this time I am going in with medical literature to back me up and a network of emails to specialists around the USA I have spoken too to help back me up in what I want done. Its time. Its a new year and I am sick of this stuff. I want a team of Doctors to get on board with me and stay on board is that so hard to ask? Ok, anyway we are finally getting over being sick and well the holidays are over once again and you all know that before we know it, it will be Christmas once again! It was fun but man I am glad its past and we are moving forward and pressing on in 2009 toward better days of sun I hope. Move forward. Have ups and downs but still stick it out. Anything has got to be better than last year, is all I know for sure! Till next post I hope you are all following thru on some of your New Years Resolutions. Mine is to keep losing my weight, I quit smoking again. VERY HARD!!!! Cold Turkey again. I know, I must love to torture myself. Withdrawals is my thing. I decide something and I just do it and I am not in a very good mood about it either. The cravings are worse this time around. I started smoking in July till Dec 31st. It started as stress relief for me and then funny thing was because I did find something to calm me down it also lowered my blood pressure! I know smoking and lowered blood pressure, HMMMMMM, it was better than pill popping or drinking. I smoked from age 16-21 then stopped and had my kids I had a relapse in Spain when Ethan was a year old but it too only lasted about 6 months and I quit. Its a huge stress reliever for me and this past year called for it. So I am doing my best to quit now 10 years later. Go Figure the odds right. Man I miss it thou. I think I enjoyed it because it really did help me get threw some very stressful issues this year. It could calm me down and help me not yell so much. My other goal is to try to get word out on my Vinyl Buisness. I really want it to take off. So friends/family please pass my site along to anyone you know and I would very greatful or send ideas for advertiseing here that are cheep. I have been doing Blog Advertising Since October. My name is out there but people are on tight budgets and I get that but holy cow you know! Anyway, Happy New Year and lets try to get thru these Resoultions this year. I am trying but man I could sure smoke right now and feel a heck of a lot better! Kidding:) Maybe!!!!

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